Story time.
I had just called Ninna and cried. I was defeated by everything around me. I was overwhelmed and I didn't feel like continuing with school. But Ninna said that I should. I needed to pray. God would help me. "Put it on Facebook! [insert name here] puts stuff up all the time for prayer requests!" To be honest, I felt annoying. I can't explain why, but it just felt weird to be asking for prayers for a little presentation. Everyone else had tests and papers and quizzes, so why should someone pray for mine? Nevertheless, I asked. And here is the rest of the story.
I was studying. Around 12:30 am I realized I had a quiz in my Origins class first hour. I hadn't studied yet. I studied for a little while. And then I studied for other things.
The next morning, I went to origins and got a good grade!! I walked out of class and had a few texts from people saying they were praying. One from my grandpa. And he texted me later saying that in their (grandma and grandpa) devotions, they read about trusting God. God will make a way for His people. (Isaiah 43:14-21) and that was a huge encouragement to me.
I had a brit lit test after chapel, and I did well on that, too! I was so excited and blessed. God was showing me little blessings all day. He was helping me through the tests and quizzes I didn't even think to go to Him for.
At work, I was anxious. I had 2 hours of work before my presentation, and-- ask the girls-- I was anxious. My stomach was in knots. My throat was dry.
And then I was actually sitting in class, waiting. I almost passed out. I felt like throwing up. My friend Mike kept reassuring me that I would do fine.
I went up and began my presentation. I stumbled. A lot. I made up weird sentences. I still have no idea what I said.
I was upset when I walked away because I didn't feel like I did well.
I was upset for 2 reasons.
1. I simply wanted to prove to everyone that I could do it. I haven't gotten through a single Spanish presentation yet, in my two years of taking these classes.
And
2. I wanted to have a great story about how God gave me all the words, because of everyone who prayed. I wanted to post that everyone's prayers worked and that God really does hear!
But
I didn't feel like I had that story. I didn't do well. I had to walk away because I couldn't remember anything. And everyone still thought of me the same- the girl who can't get through a presentation. No one has ever been rude to me about it, but I feel inadequate in these things.
I went to dinner with my friend, Brittni, and she asked me to go to Christian service with her. I honestly did not feel up to it. How could I be a blessing to them when I felt like God wasn't blessing me for my hard work nor blessing everyone's prayers?
Then another friend asked me to go as well.
So I went.
And we sang to the residents of the Baymont nursing home. And prayed with them. And there is no way I could have blessed them more than they blessed me.
One lady I remember the most, she was Greek. My heart ached for her because she had her rosary beads and her Catholic Bible in her hands. But I sang to her. And she cried. I went to her and she pulled me in to hug her. She kissed my cheek, like the Greek do, and she said in her broke English, "Thank you so much."
I had no desire to go. But that meant the world to me.
I left (but didn't want to!), and felt so much love and joy.
On our way back to the school, I decided to see if Mrs. Kozar (THE best teacher I have had so far) had put up the grades yet. I scanned. "OP Testimonio" was the first line. I followed the line and saw my grade.
My mouth dropped.
"GUYS! You will NOT believe this!!"
I smiled. So much. I got a 74! It may not sound like a good grade to you, but for me? That's AMAZING!
I called grandma and grandpa today and told them the longer version of this story (yes it could be longer), and I told them this:
I felt so ashamed. God wanted to show me how great He is! Oh ye of little faith! That was me! I knew He COULD help me, but I didn't believe He would. But everyone that prayed for me had bigger faith than I did! They knew God would help me.
So.
Thank you. Thank you to everyone who prayed, texted, called, set a reminder, commented on the post, and trusted in our amazing, majestic, all-powerful God!
You all are blessings to me.
And I thank God for all of you.
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